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About Stuart Heritage

Hello, I’m Stuart Heritage, and I write things instead of having a real job. Primarily I do this for The Guardian, where I write about film and TV and occasionally stand in for people more famous than me.

But at other times I’ve also written for the NME, the Radio Times, Cosmopolitan, Vice, Virgin Media and probably some more. I also co-author LUVandHAT.com, a blog about arguing, with my smashing cohort Robyn Wilder. You should read that. It’s good. I’m also on telly sometimes. But not often. I blame my haircut.

I founded and edited hecklerspray, which was a website that some people quite liked, for five years until I ran out of ways to call Paris Hilton a fanny. In addition to this, I’ve written for TV shows like Tonightly, Unnovations and Celebrity Juice. I apologise wholeheartedly for most of that last sentence, by the way.

OTHER THINGS ABOUT ME SORRY I’LL STOP SOON:

* For two years running, the Independent named me as one of the 50 most influential emerging figures in the British media, but that was ages ago so it shows what they fucking know.

* If you own a copy of Charlie Brooker’s decade-old TV Go Home spin-off book, you’ll see a full-page picture of me doing a wee. Here is visual proof:

* Lately I’ve been asked to talk at things a bit, and I’ve been able to cover my obvious lack of expertise with swearwords. More visual proof:

* I have a literary agent, so at some point I’ll probably write a book. Contact him if your ideas on this matter are better than mine.

* I bake quite a lot now. DON’T YOU DARE JUDGE ME.

* If you want to get in touch, to offer me work or money or food or just some basic human contact, you should do it here.

Now be on your way.

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